When you and your partner fight, do you or you both resort to some low blows? Do you say some nasty things to one another you later regret? Or, does it seem like your partner is punishing you for something you did by withholding affection and sex from you? If any of this feels like
Do you feel the need to let your partner know, in exquisite and completely honest detail, the exact ways you feel s/he disappointed, angered, infuriated you, and so on? Or, perhaps you routinely see your partner inflict this punishment upon you. In either case, you and/your partner are likely engaged in a losing strategy called
Have you ever found yourself thinking, “I need to control my partner” to make our relationship work? If so, you’re not alone, but this mindset is often a losing strategy that can damage intimacy and trust. According to a Relational Life-Trained Therapist, trying to manage or control your partner doesn’t just create distance—it can lead
Do you ever find yourself wondering, why my partner and I fight so often? You’re not alone. Many couples struggle to navigate conflict in ways that feel productive and supportive. Whether it’s small disagreements that escalate or recurring arguments that never seem to resolve, the frustration can take a toll on your relationship. As a
Relational Jiu Jitsu is all about sliding underneath the surface of a poorly delivered bid for connection to capture what’s most meaningful in the bid. Rather than fighting fire with fire, this is all about seeing the punches and maneuvering gracefully to the side of them.
We can either turn toward, turn way, or turn against. Our relationship future rests predominantly on which of these 3 doors we walk through and how often we choose to walk through them.
Turning Toward: The Single Biggest Predictor of Relationship Happiness and Stability Read More »
Ultimately, raising a child effectively often means putting ourselves aside. We have to do our best to consistently present as our best versions of ourselves as individuals and as partners so that our child has his/her best chance of developing in the healthiest ways. Every moment matters and your child is always watching and absorbing information, even when you might feel s/he is not.
One Exciting Strategy to Rescue a Failing Relationship with a Couple Who Have Children Read More »
Shame is one unfortunate feeling that often appears in couples with a low desire partner. The low desire partner can often suffer from feeling as though there is something terribly wrong with him/her. This partner might incorrectly believe that this lack of sexual interest must mean s/he does not like, love, and/or respect his/her partner anymore.
Why is Sex Unsatisfying in My Relationship? Read More »
Also, part of your value and source of happiness may be missing without sex. Perhaps, as a man or woman, it used to bring you tremendous joy to sexually please your partner, and now that that is missing, you are, to some extent, less joyful, satisfied, and happy. For men, in particular, this can be even more potently painful, as their value is often linked to pleasing their partner sexually. So, with that out of the equation, it can further add to pain linked to a perceived lack of masculinity/manhood and worth.
My Partner and I Aren’t Having Sex. Do We Really Need to Fix This? Read More »
In this country in particular, another message that often bombards us all from birth is the idea that our negative emotions are bad. Not only is this incredibly untrue, but when we believe this, it directly contributes to procrastination. If we aren’t supposed to feel distressed, worried, fearful, overwhelmed, guilty, shameful, irritated, and dread, just to name a few common ones related to procrastination, then it will be quite the challenge to begin working on a task where some or all these emotions burst up to the surface.
How to Help an Irrational Person with Tremendous Fear Read More »
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